In the past four years I’ve seen incredible amount of people achieving amazing dadbods, while minority of us struggle in agony of leanness and muscularity.
It took me some time, but I’ve finally found the major key to success, there is more to getting a bonafide dadbod, but this here is a good place to start.
Here are a few easy steps for that bomb-ass belly.
1st step, make sure that you’re never optimistic; you can’t do it, it won’t get easier, no you must have that muffin.
2nd step is to half-ass your most hated workouts, that will eventually make you give up on exercising in general.
3rd step is to make sure to eat raw or boiled broccoli and lean tuna without adding any dressing, light philadelphia cheese or whatever. In other words make sure to eat your orthorexic food it in the most disgusting form possible.
Extra kcal = good for the taste buds and sanity = less chance to binge.
4th Make your first diet a crash diet, consisted of shakes, cabbage and coffee. Where you lose 10 kilos a week and get extreme mood swings, that will make you to yell at your dog/kids for no reason.
5th Do not hire any coach from your local community, don’t ask friends for recommendations. Instead, pay some Youtuber/FB guy who wouldn’t bother about your feedback as those in your area would.
All those god forsaken steps will ensure that you won’t ever have any issues with looking like those narcissistic Greek gods.
Enjoy your binges and food comas, your one and only #dadbod architect.